Bending the Rules

POOPED DOG OWNERS TO GET A REPRIEVE                              For Immediate Release
Breakthrough research changes puppy raising.

Genetic engineering has produced another breakthrough discovery for dog owners worldwide.  The team of scientists who brought you non-shedding, hypoallergenic Labradoodles has successfully bred the first litter of No-Doodles, a new breed that doesn’t need to defecate. “We were getting a lot of calls from dog lovers who felt the whole dog experience was great, except for the pooping,” said lead scientist Peter Squat.  Squat owns 5 of the new breed, and no poop bags. “We’ve been working on this for years,” Squat went on to say, “We thought we had it solved when we successfully bred a dog that picked up its own poop. But, a flaw was revealed in the genetic code which caused the dogs to throw the poop at their owner, rather than in the garbage. That failed user testing.”

"Now I can go paper instead of plastic at the supermarket," said environmentalist Kale Granola.

With the foolproof No-Doodles breeding program now in place, pet industry leaders are excited about the early buzz coming from dog lovers.  “I’m going to get one as soon as possible,” exclaimed dog owner Neal Never who is known around his neighborhood as the “sidewalk miner,” “laziest guy I’ve ever met,” and “someone who deserves to step in his own dog’s poo while barefoot.”

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Note from CATCH: Having a good sense of humor is great for your mental health and makes classes more fun for your clients.  Here’s to taking some time out for a smile and to not taking ourselves too seriously. Happy training!

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